inlove versus love
Bossa Nova, yellow lights, a relaxed atmoshphere, alone, and a long time to kill are all ingredients for a reflection. This time, the idea of love and being inlove is running in circles inside my head. I've memorized this line I thought of already, what with the countless times I thought about this? "Love starts when being inlove ends". Of course, that statement doesn't hold true all the time. This statement is not actually meant to be a definition of love but it's the challenge of love. This is how you know if you truly love the person. It's easier to forgive, to put yourself aside, to change yourself when you're in love. Naturally! You're so high with "love chemicals" that you're to numb to even care how much it would normally hurt, or be a bother. It's wonderful how the body works, but once you mind catches up with your body, when you start crashing down from your high, that's when loving starts. That's when things are starting to take its toll. That's when you start realizing that you're sick of giving way, you're sick of just plainly understanding, sweet words and gestures don't really work anymore. Once this happens, you're not in love any more. You're as vulnerable as an cant crawling on the bathroom wall, being watched by someone doing #2. You either get blocked by fingers, get sprayed or drowned with water, flicked by fingers or be squashed for no reason! If you know the risks, if you're feeling the heaviness, when you feel like you've had enough and yet you still continue with the relationship, then congratulations! You are already, truly, loving someone. Now hang in there because the crash is always difficult. It'll be painfull, annoying and downright unreasonable. There'll be times when you just want to quit, but you won't. Don't. It's just a phase. You'll get through it eventually, then you'll slip into to the monotonous conundrum of life. Now that, that is another thing. Another reflection for another night like this. I'm hungry, better eat this ultimate grilled cheese before it gets too cold!